I had seen pictures in brochures. Sunny beaches
and people having fun.
Girls in bikinis and guys wearing nothing more than a
marble bag for lack of a better- or funnier word. But
until I walked of American Airlines flight #1860 into
Tampa international airport and greeted NWA Florida promoter
and NWA President Howard Brody I would have never expected
a trip like this. So sit back, grab a delicious coffee
and laugh a little as I fumble and bumble my way through
my latest touring dilemma...
Upon greeting Howard he informed me that I'd be rooming
with Reckless Youth and that his plane would be coming
in in a few minutes so we hung out and waited. Youth's
plane arrived 20 minutes early so hey we're off to a good
start, right? Well sir, as fate would have it thunderstorms
were delaying flights from taking off so despite his 20
minute earliness, he ended up waiting on the plane another
40 minutes making him 20 minutes late in the end. We meet
up with him and proceed to get his baggage.
Here we go... the thunderstorms which have delayed planes
from leaving have also delayed the unpacking of planes
which have been sitting on the runway waiting for a place
to unload passengers and their stuff. That is what was
told to us as we waited, and waited, and waited for what
seemed to be eternity but actually was around an hour
and a half for Youth's luggage to come off the plane.
Okay, we go, check into the hotel and plop ourselves down
for an afternoon nap with the tv on. "Gurgle, gurgle"
What was that, I thought. "Gurgle, gurgle, blup-blup-blup"
What the hell? I walk over to the hotel sink to find the
most unholy black sludge working it's way up the sink-ola.
Furthermore, let me tell you about the smell. Ahh, the
smell... No sooner had I turned around holding my nose
and Reckless was already on the phone demanding another
They moved us to another room. A nicer room. "Hey, very
nice" I though. And there laying on my bed was a loving
note from management. So loving in fact that I kept it
so I could share it with you word for frickin' word.
IMPORTANT NOTICE it reads at the top in giant bold writing.
We would like to take moment to inform you of a Florida
tradition that may make you a little squimish.
Every year between June and November we experience our
tropical rain season. During this time period, some underground
insects venture to the surface.
From time to time the insects will find their way into
the hotel rooms and cause a fuss. The ones that tend draw
the most attention are our Palmetto Bugs. They look like
large flying Roaches.
Please, please understand that these insects are not harmful
and in no way justify the cleanliness of this hotel.
It is simply a seasonal issue that all Floridians experience
in our homes and businesses once a year.
Just an added note- our pest control company has added
additional manpower to help combat this issue, but should
you have a insect concern, please notify the front desk
and we will be happy to assist you in any way possiable."
Oh, chrimany where should I start, AND I'll have you know
that they misspelled possible at the end. LOL
First of all, I have a correction of my own to make.
The statement "From time to time the insects will find
their way into the hotel rooms and cause a fuss." That
should read " From time to time these insects will find
their way into the hotel rooms and cause heartfailure
to our guests."
Oh, I can't bash Florida too bad. Desite the rainy, humid
weather our hotel room was really nice and the show itself
was great. I always like meeting new people and watching
guys wrestle who I've only read about. NWA Florida Junior
Heavyweight Champion, Lex Lovett won the tournament after
beating Christopher Daniels, and Reckless Youth in the
finals in a three-way dance.
Unfortunately Reckless suffered a hip injury that night.
I hope it isn't too serious. I enjoyed his company during
the day as we laughed about the hotel room situations
and got to know him a little more over lunch as we chatted
about our families and where we've worked.
He left right after the show and had a 6am flight the
next day so he didn't join everyone for some late night
I woke up the next morning and as expected, Reckless was
gone. Check out time wasn't until 12 noon and my flight
home wasn't until 7:28pm that night.
I relaxed until checkout time and then headed to the airport.
I had 6 hours to pass and Mick Foley's new book to read
so I was set! After a few hours I noticed that my flight
had been pushed back to 7:45pm. I figured that was okay
and my layover would be cut down some. Howeer, when I
saw that my flight was now delayed until 9:45 pm, for
whatever reason I figured that my connecting flight would
be pushed back too. So, with that bit of insight- or should
I say offsight, I continued reading and didn't check in
until 8:30pm. "Your going to miss your connecting flight,
sir" I was told. So back to the hotel I go with the next
Portland flight leaving at 7:30am the next day. The lady
tells me to wait outside the bagga area under thre American
Airlines sign and that the shuttle should be there in
20 minutes. 20 minutes comes and goes and infact another
20 comes and goes with no shuttle. I place a call to the
hotel where the lady politely tells me that she will inform
them to look for me. 45 minutes later and I'm getting
past the point of no return. It's late, it's humid and
sticky out. I'm 3,000 miles from home and i'm getting
crabby fast. I place another call and the lasy asks if
I have been waiting at blue 1 under Taxi's and Limo's.
"No" I replied, "Right outside under the American Airlines
sign." "Go to blue1" she says. "They've been looking for
Now I'm past crabby and fast approaching pissed as I walk
down to the sign that I saw before but figured I wasn't
getting picked up by at taxi or limo. Down, down, down
I walk only to see blue 2. At this point I have gone beyone
both crabby and pissed and am now madder than a spring
hornet as I am cursing under my breath. Blue 1 is about
500 yards the other way and I'm tired of everyone and
everything at this point. Thankfully the shuttle is there
within 2 minutes and brings me to a really nice hotel.
At 10:40pm I check in and plop down on the bed, arms folded
and bitter like an 8 year old boy just sent to his room.
I'm not hungry, not sleepy, I just want to get home.
I start reading my book and drift off to sleep but knowing
that I need to be at the airport at 6:45am I keep jumping
up and check the clock just as I fall asleep. It just
seems like nothing is going to go right. I don't feel
like eating although I am hungry. I wander downstairs
hoping that some food would ease my madness, but at 2:15am
everything is shut down and I'm reduced to strawberry
Pop-tarts and a Coke at the vending machine.
I end up taking the 5am shuttle to the airport becasue
I can't sleep and might as well be at the airport. I finally
catch my flight on time and whisk away back home where
I throw myself down on the ground upon arrival and rejoice
at the sight of my family and house.
Can you believe it?? Now that it's done I look back and
laugh but man- what a trip.
I recieved a call yesterday from Dr. Luther who told me
that a few of us are on an upcoming tour of Canada for
Western Canadian Extreme Wrestling. Alberta and Saskatchewan-
just about all parts will be covered including Regina
which is a town I really enjoy. After writing down all
the cities and then taking a look at my map, this may
be the most extensive driving tour yet. My last date for
the tour is Aug. 12th in Edmonton and on Aug. 14th I leave
Portland for Philadelphia at 7:30am. It's going to be
a challenging month to say the least. I'm certain there
will be plenty to tell you about but I may not write for
over a month.
Until then have a good summer
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from the boys:
Notorious T.I.D. says "Well, I guess it's time to start naming some names. Sweet Daddy Devestation.......you stink.....go wash. Jamie Jackson.......you stink.....go wash. Magnus.......quit shitting yourself."