Can I use the word "Fuck" in my titles?
by Dan Titus on 2002-04-02

I was watching the sports news this morning, and besides Hazel Mae,the hottie sports chick who hosts the show, I was amazed at just how stupid some people can be. Maryland wins the NCAA basketball title, and some switch goes off in the heads of some local fans. Sheesh, I love sports, but I have never felt my team winning gave me a legitimate excuse to destroy property. When your team wins, fine, feel good, drink a little, but when you start destroying people's businesses, you are no longer a sports fan. You're just a moron.

I can remember how Nanaimo wrestling fans went to the last show,preparing to take to the streets and tear shit up in the event Manson actually wrestled a good match. Then we realized that the necessary planetary alignment needed to facilitate such an occurence simply was not going to happen. But....Ya tried real hard Manson.

The new era of RAW opened fairly promisingly last night. I believe the concept of opening a wrestling show with a match will feel strange at first, but we will eventually begin to expect all shows to begin in the same manner. This could be revolutionary.

Guerrero vs RVD for the IC belt? There is absolutely no way this could possibly suck.Unless Guerrero gets fired again. But I heard he is recieving very good advice from Darryl Strawberry and Robert Downey Jr, so everything should be ok.

Pushing Bradshaw could be fun. I always love how he gets in one fight, BAM! Gets in another fight, BAM! Another fight, BAM! He gets points with me because the first thing he did with the NWO brawl was head right for Xpac. KA-POWIE! Matter of fact, I declare Bradshaw the first ever Xpac punching champion, this title will be defended 24-7,like the Hardcore title. Bradshaw can surprise Xpac and beat him up anytime,anywhere. If Bradshaw clobbers him at the Dairy Queen before the show, that will be considered a title defense. Someone must punish Xpac for those NWO shortpants.Ugh.

A Molly Holly heel turn and I get to see the ad for the Red Green movie all in one night? Life is good, life is very good. I've always been partial to her.



The only problem's are, they've jobbed her out to every woman on the roster, and secondly, disrupting anything involving Terri Runnels may be seen as an of kindness, and won't generate the necessary feelings of anger in the denizens of wrestling fandom*. I think that if they really wanted her to get over as a heel, this episode of RAW should have ended with her giving Austin the Stunner. I would have marked. The thought of cute little Molly behaving badly makes me all tingly. They may wanna dress her up in one of those little private school outfits too.

*This means you.

It was hilarious watching Flair strut around the ring for like,three minutes, while Austin stood there looking...really bored waiting. I bet Molly wouldn't have waited. She's evil now,ya know.

By the way, I'm starting a petition to have the Queen Mum buried in a KISS Kasket. She was always a rebel.

The Royal Family can look as dignified as Gene here*:



*You never saw the pics in Maxim where he was on top of the girls inside that thing.

BTW,The first time I walk past a newsstand and see a magazine cover declaring "Pamela Anderson's courageous battle with Hepatitis C" I'll puke. I bet it's coming. Maybe if she wasn't dumb enough to get it in the first place...You notice Kid Rock ain't braggin' about his trophy girlfriend now?

Sometimes it feels good to behave like a prick.