Putting the lime with the coconut, mix it all up.
by Dan Titus on 2002-04-23

So I guess recent events indicate there won't be a Beretta reunion special. Come to think of it, the only two cast members I remember are Robert Blake and that damn bird, but the bird is dead and Blake's goose may be cooked. Dude, he was one of the Little Rascals(Of course, he joined the series long after people had stopped caring) but I think he may in a bit more trouble than the time Alf-alfa turned the church ballet recital into a food fight. No basis for comparison.

But Beretta was from that era of 70's tv where all the cops only had one name. Mccloud. Banacek.Colombo.Kojak. Go ahead, try to find Colombo's full name, you won't.

Christ, Banacek? You'd spend 50 minutes watching the show, and then George Peppard(Pre A-Team) would do this moronic voiceover that would explain in great detail how the crime was committed, as if the average television viewer was waaaaaaaaaay too stupid to figure it out on his own.

But see, me and Manson would have been cool as 70's tv detectives. We would have spent every show making snappy banter, annoying the higher ups at the police department, serve our own special brand of justice to the bad guys, and then end every show boogeying till dawn at the local disco. Surefire ratings winner. Not sure if this would have gone too far in the 80's but me and Manson would have likely ended up doing a Saturday morning cartoon with Mr T or something.Sad. Millions of kids deprived of the chance to have a pic of Manson on a lunchbox.

So this column now shifts bit I guess. I'm going to try to make it more of a pop culture/current events sort of thing, with the odd bit of wrestling stuff tossed in. Think I'll take a bit of a break from writing about sports entertainment for a spell.

Maybe I'll go a few movies over the next few weeks and review them. Thing is, I don't take the time to go to movies very often. I do like the relaxed atmosphere though, and my taste in movies tends to be pretty pedestrian. I need escapism in movies, more action adventure type stuff, ya know? Lots of bombs going off and the female lead eventually getting naked sort of thing.

First, Aerosmith does the now legendarily bad Superbowl performance with Britney and NSYNC, now they do the classic Spider-Man theme song for the movie. Wow, way to maintain that image as the bad boys of rock. More like the altar boys of rock at this point.

I was watching the new episode of The Simpson's at Halsall's place the other night( He would write a column, but he doesn't like any of you) and at the end of the show,via song, the writers stated they were pretty much outta ideas at this point. I would rather see something go out on top rather than new episodes only bringing back memories about how great it used to be. Thing is, some are liable to go on serious Homer withdrawl. Wait till you see the mass destruction on that day. But the show,over the last few years, morphed into what the Ernest films became. "Ok,this week, Homer joins the navy. Next week, he becomes a basketball player". Now it's become what it used to mercilessly poke fun at.Groundskeeper Willie, my tears are for thee.

If you have something you want me to rant on in this space, titus@moondogmanson.com