Blueberries make you go pooh pooh...
by Dan Titus on 2002-09-10

In reflecting on last nights Raw, I am reminded of the words from Boris Karloff (And if some of you young'uns don't know who that is, brush up on your classic cinema) doing the narration on the animated version of "The Grinch Who Stole Xmas":

"Stink.Stank.STUNK".

Now I am not sure if Vince's heart is two sizes too small , or if there is garlic in his soul, but if he thinks last nights performance wasn't enough to make a lot of his audience jump ship, he must be hitting the hippie lettuce with a VENGEANCE.

"Ok, tonight is the return of Monday Night Football, featuring the season opener of the defending Superbowl champion New England Patriots. What do you think is the best way to entice viewers to stay with us? I know, lets get a pair of faux lesbians to have a weaker make out session than a 6th grade dance, and then have two guys continue their woman beating fetish." Christ, forget Vince, I think a lot of viewers may start puffing up a few fatties after that display.

The segment failed to titilate, or even amuse. Besides, lesbians aren't exactly shocking in this day and age. Howard Stern featured them doing similar things on his TV shows all the time. It's not breaking new ground. I just wonder how the crowd would have reacted if they brought out a pair of lesbos that looked like Rosie O'Donnell.

Way to go Vince, make more parents very leery of letting their children watch your programming. And some people say you're not a genius.

Just think people, if this is coming from a known pervert...

Dudes, until Saturday night, I never knew women had such taxing problems being women. I was talking to a female friend on the phone, and we were talking about sex (imagine that) and she told me about the whole diaphram thing. I always figured this was easy stuff, like a guy putting on a cup before football practice. But, no. First, ya gotta spray this junk on it to keep your horny moronic spermies from greeting her eggs, and then ya gotta jam it in, up until it hits the cervix. Damn. It really doesn't seem worth the pay off. So guys, make sure you ram her real good, so at least she gets something out of the experience. Besides, anything that prevents more wrestling fans from being born can only be good for society.

What I am talking about is her recent foray into the official WWF chatroom. She had never been in a wrestling themed chat before, but thought "It may be fun" . She came away with the impression that wrestling fans are a bunch of antisocial and misogynistic losers. Damn, and here I thought her and the chatter using the nick "I_Wanna_Fuck_You" were going to have a good rapport. What other reasons do wrestling chatrooms exist? I wonder if wrestling fans were always like this, or if its a price we pay for the informational value of cyberspace. I do the love the often criminal assault on basic literacy as well, like this gem from the realactionwrestling.com forum:

Leave Brin alone you gay asssplunker. dont you have to go get your check from the fountin in the mall you welfair asshoel.

Yeah! You told him! I bet he cries right now, whenever he goes to that "fountin".